Choose Life - Suicide Preventiion

13 Reasons Why Suicide is Not the Answer – Part 3

(Note: This post is three of a four-part series. Previous – Part 1, Part 2)


Reason #6: You will feel very different in ten years

My life has been a long list of ugly, devastating experiences. I discovered that over time, my feelings had changed. The horrible divorce was over and my life was better. The emotional control of an abusive husband disappeared. The horrid words my “good” friend said to me no longer had an impact. The bullying I endured in high school ended. The desire to take my life went away.

What you are feeling today will not be what you are feeling six months or even six years down the road. Your circumstances will change. You will grow. The situation will be resolved. And as you focus more and more on the positives of your uniqueness, your mind will start to heal. Those chemicals we talked about will be adjusted. One day, you will wake up and realize that you are happy.

The best part will be that you admit that you are stronger for what you went through and survived. Yes, misery won’t allow you to see that right now. Ignore that lie and have hope.

Reason #7: There is hope and a future for you

Whatever situation you’re in that is causing you to feel like giving up does not have to continue. There is a different future you can choose. When I was seventeen, I wrote down a list of character traits I wanted to have – even in my depression. I listed the qualities of a good mother. I imagined having integrity, caring for others, working hard, being filled with a healthy self-esteem, and other qualities. I am there. I have developed every one of those items.

There is a future for you. Look at where you are now and make a list of where you want to be in the future. Just writing it down cements in in your subconscious and you will naturally start on that journey. There is hope!

Reason #8:  You have the power to change how you feel

I used to hate exercise. That feeling was valid. I found it boring and it hurt and it seemed to take so long. But my health is important, and when I do exercise, every part of my life is easier. In addition, because it’s the hardest thing to do, I feel better about myself. I am conquering something that was difficult for me. How did I change that feeling? Instead of saying “I hate to exercise,” I imagine my body filled with a life color (green for me) and I say “I love to exercise. I love how toned and fit I am. And I love the energy I get from it.” Just changing my thought process and what I say to myself made all the difference. I now love to exercise.

Our feelings, valid as they are, can change with our self-talk. I understand how depression can make our self-talk negative. Believe me, I’ve been there. But by changing just one item in that self-talk is a great beginning to change that feeling. Find one behavior that you want to change, and make it different by making it a positive.

For example, “I don’t want to cut myself anymore,” can be changed to “I like how I feel when I take care of my skin. I am exercising control over myself and it feels good.”

Reason #9: You have the power to change your situation

I did not like where I was, so I chose to change the path I was on. And it worked. You, too, have that same power.  You have a choice. You can start today and choose a different path. Your outside circumstances may not change yet, but they will. But they can only change if you decide to go a different way.

Next – Part 4